After Sesame Street, one of my favorite shows as a kid and even now, is the Muppet Show. A bunch of fun characters all trying to do a successful show and depending how you look at it, either succeeding fantastically or failing miserably..
This clip has been out for a while, but it's always fun to watch.
One of the lyrics is "Mama, I just killed a man.. I put a gun against his head, pulled the trigger and now he's dead".. Not very child-friendly.. and the Muppets manage to get over that completely, by Animal hunting for his Mama (everyone say awww)
Love it!
Random thoughts
I haven't posted in a while, different issues coming up and down and around and just my thoughts have been elsewhere.. Anyways, here's a small summary of the days before..
* Just two days ago, a classmate of mine (she was 29) has passed away. A few days ago, one of my friends was hospitalized for high blood pressure. What is going on...
Is it the foods we consume? Is it the pollution in the air we breathe? Is it just our lifestyles - fast life, fast foods, fast communication? Who knows...
We must make the most of every moment and when we can, see the people we love and tell them we love them because you never know...
* Is it so difficult for people to get along? As usual, I am having issues at my store. Its not like its a difficult operation, I have a lady who helps me in sales (she's trustworthy and quite a nice woman, but she finds it tough to get on with certain customers and the security officer here). I have a LSO (lady security officer) who is quite ok but she is set in her ways and can be a pain sometimes. I also have a guy who helps with organizing and arranging the place. Why can't these 3 people get along? Every day there is some issue, and now the sales lady doesn't talk to the LSO nor the guy. I have other work, people! I cannot be spending ALL day here babysitting..
* So tired... I used to be a person who could party all night, now I can barely survive after 1030pm. I guess that's part of being a mum and totally unfit. However, I have been going for my classes regularly (will post the results of the measuring session over the weekend) and we shall see what the results are... getting back the the partying - I love being social but this is too taxing. The main issue is Sonny boy wakes up so early.. love him to bits though, he sings now for his milk.. Total love infatuation..
Mothers Part II
Is it just me, or do mothers really not get on with their daughters? Sometimes I think I should go to a shrink (anyone can recommend someone?) just to see what's going on..
Case in point - today, while Sonny boy was eating his breakfast, Mother drops by to see us before heading into work. This is the normal procedure, which is nice and allows the grandson to indulge in healthy conversation with Acha. Anyway, we got talking about his appetite or lack of.. But I was proud of him, he was actually eating avocado which had taken me an age to get him to eat. I think the idea of green mushy fruit didn't really appeal to his palate. Anyway, Mother went on saying, "Don't feed him too much, he'll get sick of it.." Now for those who know my mum, she can be a slight bit pushy at times... anyways, in a joking way, I just said "Mum, its either i don't feed him enough and he's getting thin or i am feeding him TOO much." And she got mad at me, saying i am totally jumpy and snapping at her.. I wasn't snapping, I haven't had much sleep last night (the temperatures were too cold suddenly, then too warm).. I was not trying to be rude, but my mum is like that.. One time, she will critize me for not doing things properly, bringing up my kid wrong, feeding him junk, not making him fatter, etc. then she tries and impose her rules and conditions on me, like I am a small kid. But I am trying to do what's right for myself, my family and my child. Why does it always feel like I am doing something wrong..
Mood is very very sad now. I hope someone can comment on this..
Case in point - today, while Sonny boy was eating his breakfast, Mother drops by to see us before heading into work. This is the normal procedure, which is nice and allows the grandson to indulge in healthy conversation with Acha. Anyway, we got talking about his appetite or lack of.. But I was proud of him, he was actually eating avocado which had taken me an age to get him to eat. I think the idea of green mushy fruit didn't really appeal to his palate. Anyway, Mother went on saying, "Don't feed him too much, he'll get sick of it.." Now for those who know my mum, she can be a slight bit pushy at times... anyways, in a joking way, I just said "Mum, its either i don't feed him enough and he's getting thin or i am feeding him TOO much." And she got mad at me, saying i am totally jumpy and snapping at her.. I wasn't snapping, I haven't had much sleep last night (the temperatures were too cold suddenly, then too warm).. I was not trying to be rude, but my mum is like that.. One time, she will critize me for not doing things properly, bringing up my kid wrong, feeding him junk, not making him fatter, etc. then she tries and impose her rules and conditions on me, like I am a small kid. But I am trying to do what's right for myself, my family and my child. Why does it always feel like I am doing something wrong..
Mood is very very sad now. I hope someone can comment on this..
Hubby love
They say, the way to a person's heart is through their stomachs. I say, person because I assume that men and women have the same weaknesses. I am no exception.. The other day, I was truly wiped out after another marathon aerobic session and I was in no mood to cook dinner. In fact, I was moaning about it to myself on the way back home. However, I was in for a pleasant surprise.. I was greeted by the pleasant smell of cooking coming from the kitchen. I peep in, and witness my Hubby sweating and slogging away. Hearing the door, he turned around and with his goofy smile, he chased me out saying not to worry about dinner. So, I decided to slouch and rest my sorry body till food was ready. An hour later, Hubby comes upstairs very smugly and with Nanny in tow. What did he make - homemade pizza! It was so yummy and truly a delight to eat. Not only because I was tired, and dying to eat some cheese but pizza, come on! Its always good stuff.. and homemade dough.. Considering he cannot eat tomatoes, he made the base out of grated peppers and added mushrooms, cheese, and even marinated and roasted some chicken bits too.. very cool.. Needless to say, I was feeling very loved.. and if that's not love, I don't know what is..
Sex and the City
I was never into the whole "Sex and the City" thing... I never had a bunch of girlfriends who would regularly hang out.. Ok, sure when the few girlfriends I had did happen to meet up, we would have the whole conversation about men and how much they sucked.. and what our current boyfriends were like, and all the kinky secrets we would have... In Uni, where I was supposed to have grown up, I had a best friend, who was my Miranda/Carrie/Charlotte all in one and I hope I was that for her... Later on, I remember seeing clips of the show and I would think, "Huh.. seems interesting.. but was it that groundbreaking?"
Hubby and I just started watching the entire series. For most men, this would be sheer torture, left to the female species to get all worked up over and exert the estrogen feuds on their libidos later.. But for Hubby, strangely enough, I think he enjoys it.. Not in the same way women do, of course, but I guess it helps him understand my weirdness and makes him realize what a wonderful catch I am.
If I had to compare myself with one of those women, I would certainly not be Samantha - I do not have that sexual confidence she does, plus I am way more discrete :) Charlotte is very naive and so sweet - very unlike me.. The closest I would be is probably a mix of cynical Miranda and a complicated Carrie. Unlike Carrie though, I don't think so much into relationships.. I mean, what's the point of drama.. Its way too much effort to keep track and plus it takes up too much mental energy and time.. Miranda - she's more practical but she really needs to be a nicer person..
Anyways, we are on the second season so we have a while to go..
In the meantime, good old YouTube and I found this goody from the TV Land awards some time back, featuring one of the great comediennes Bea Arthur (from Golden Girls - a wonderful sweet sitcom which brings joy to my mum and me - that is for another post!). It shows our lovely foursome in the not-so-distant future.. always fun!
Hubby and I just started watching the entire series. For most men, this would be sheer torture, left to the female species to get all worked up over and exert the estrogen feuds on their libidos later.. But for Hubby, strangely enough, I think he enjoys it.. Not in the same way women do, of course, but I guess it helps him understand my weirdness and makes him realize what a wonderful catch I am.
If I had to compare myself with one of those women, I would certainly not be Samantha - I do not have that sexual confidence she does, plus I am way more discrete :) Charlotte is very naive and so sweet - very unlike me.. The closest I would be is probably a mix of cynical Miranda and a complicated Carrie. Unlike Carrie though, I don't think so much into relationships.. I mean, what's the point of drama.. Its way too much effort to keep track and plus it takes up too much mental energy and time.. Miranda - she's more practical but she really needs to be a nicer person..
Anyways, we are on the second season so we have a while to go..
In the meantime, good old YouTube and I found this goody from the TV Land awards some time back, featuring one of the great comediennes Bea Arthur (from Golden Girls - a wonderful sweet sitcom which brings joy to my mum and me - that is for another post!). It shows our lovely foursome in the not-so-distant future.. always fun!
Chocolate Brownies
This is the please the blog readers...Keep posting what you would like me attempt next, ok :-)
This recipe is from one of my childhood cooking books. It makes all your favorites made very simple. I made this to half-quantities, just to please my chocolate urge and my keeping-healthy-food-in-my-diet urge..
Preheat your oven to 210C or 350C and grease your baking dish with butter. Melt 1 Anchor butter (227g) on a pan on low heat as it can burn.
In a bowl, mix 1 cup (190g) of sugar with 50g of cocoa powder. Stir in the melted butter with a wooden spoon. Add 2 eggs and 1/2 tsp of vanilla. Then add 87g of flour and mix till smooth. You can add some nuts if you like..
Then put into your greased dish and bake for 40-50min.
Now, as the books says, the hardest bit - let it cool before cutting :-)
Vegetable Lasagna
Finally, after a very long time, I have attempted to cook again. On FB, people have been suggesting chocolatey things but this seems like more fun! I found this recipe, because Hubby is allergic to tomatoes and it seemed like a challenge to make a nice tasty lasagna withOUT tomatoes.
When making lasagna, there are 3 different toppings - the vegetable topping, the white sauce and the cheese filling. So I will seperate each of them to make things easier.
Firstly, cook the lasagna sheets. I made the mistake of making this once RAW.. the toppings were yum but the sheets was so-so :)
White Sauce
First heat up 50g of butter in a pan. To that you add 50g of flour. When it is bubbling, add 720ml (or 3 cups) of milk. When it boils, it should thicken. Set it aside.
Cheese Filling
Hand whip 2 cups of ricotta cheese or cottage cheese. To that, you add 2 eggs, 35g parmesan cheese, 1 tsp basil, 1/2 tsp oregano and if you like, a pinch of pepper. Set aside.
Vegetables
You just heat up some olive oil, and cook the following - 240g mushrooms, 2 cups carrots, 1 cup bell peppers. There is no hard-and-fast rule with this, you can add more or less vegetables as you like. These were the amounts I used.
Now the fun bit!
Line your pan with lasagna sheets. First put some cheese filling and some grated mozzarella cheese. On top of this, put some more lasagna sheets. Then add your vegetables and put some of the white sauce on top. Again, put the lasagna sheets on top. Then put the remainder of your cheese filling and the white sauce. And add some more mozzarella cheese. That's it!
Bake at 350F or 190C for 45 min. And Voila~! you have Vegetable Lasagna!
Happiness is....
Sometimes, all it takes is a simple video to take you back to your youth... Sesame Street is now 40 years young and still going strong. I was a HUGE fan back in the day, and still catch the occasional rare clip on television. For the new generation who practically live on Anime and Ben 10, or whatever else kids watch nowadays, nothing beats a few celebrities and monsters singing along in harmony..
One of my favorite clips is of Ernie and his little rubber duckie having a harmless bath together and singing.. I used to sing this song all the time as a kid, when having a shower and it still sounds good today :-) Although, listening to it as a grownup can be a bit disturbing ("you're the one. You make bath time lots of fun... When I squeak you, you make noise") But i am willing to overlook that just for the sheer joy of reviving my youth...
One of my new favorite actors is Neil Patrick Harris.. Not only was he on one of my favorite shows as a kid, "Doogie Howser M.D" but he is always willing to have fun with his image (aka "Harold and Kumar") but he plays the best superhero of them all - the SHOE FAIRY!! What girl doesn't enjoy that ;-)
This song always moves me and I continue to sing it to my son. I think more than the lullabies, this is one of the songs I think which soothed him the most. And he's in good company... The song is more than a lovely melody, Kermit sings of a connection between people and how we can find a meaning in all the chaos around us. PS this song was nominated for an Academy Award in 1979..
I am still in shock that Sesame Street is 40 years old. I am only 27, but where did the time go? You watch kids nowadays running from tuition classes, to rushing home to quickly eat their meals, no time to spend with their families or friends.. Back in the day, we could play games with our friends out in the park, eat dinner with your parents, and watch these shows... My mum and I would bond watching this show, discussing the lessons and just overall having a good time..
So I guess this is an appropriate way to end my post by saying, "I don't want to live on the moon"...
One of my favorite clips is of Ernie and his little rubber duckie having a harmless bath together and singing.. I used to sing this song all the time as a kid, when having a shower and it still sounds good today :-) Although, listening to it as a grownup can be a bit disturbing ("you're the one. You make bath time lots of fun... When I squeak you, you make noise") But i am willing to overlook that just for the sheer joy of reviving my youth...
One of my new favorite actors is Neil Patrick Harris.. Not only was he on one of my favorite shows as a kid, "Doogie Howser M.D" but he is always willing to have fun with his image (aka "Harold and Kumar") but he plays the best superhero of them all - the SHOE FAIRY!! What girl doesn't enjoy that ;-)
This song always moves me and I continue to sing it to my son. I think more than the lullabies, this is one of the songs I think which soothed him the most. And he's in good company... The song is more than a lovely melody, Kermit sings of a connection between people and how we can find a meaning in all the chaos around us. PS this song was nominated for an Academy Award in 1979..
I am still in shock that Sesame Street is 40 years old. I am only 27, but where did the time go? You watch kids nowadays running from tuition classes, to rushing home to quickly eat their meals, no time to spend with their families or friends.. Back in the day, we could play games with our friends out in the park, eat dinner with your parents, and watch these shows... My mum and I would bond watching this show, discussing the lessons and just overall having a good time..
So I guess this is an appropriate way to end my post by saying, "I don't want to live on the moon"...
Books Vs. Tv
So, I just finished reading the first 3 books of the Sookie Stackhouse series aka True Blood and the first 3 books of the Dexter series which the series is based on... Its interesting, once you watch the shows first, you have this immediate impression of what the characters should sound like, look like.. And its interesting how far the directors deviate or emulate these characters.
TRUE BLOOD
Argueably one of the best shows I have seen in a while (and yes, it does help that the characters are very sexy).. But thanks to my good friend Judy, I got introduced to the books. Charlaine Harris, the author of the Southern Vampire series, where the characters are introduced and the show is based on is very visual in her style of writing, you get a definite sense of what the characters look and sound like. Anna Paquin who plays Sookie is very similar to her character in the books. The other supporting 'human' cast Jason Stackhouse, Granny Stackhouse and Lafayette are very well represented by their human conterparts. Lafayette is also a delight and I am very glad *spoiler* he continues to live in the tv show, he died to early in the books *end spoiler*
The vampires... That's what all the online fans seem to have a gripe with. Personally, I didn't like Bill Compton in the books, he seemed very arrogant, very uptight and generally very possessive. In the tv show, he seems a little of all those characteristics but they don't dominate him like in the books. In terms of the look, Steven Moyer is a very handsome guy and no doubt does 'look' like Bill Compton. Everyone's favorite Norseman is a different matter. Eric Northman is from Scandinavia like the actor playing him, Alexander Skarsgaard. However, that's where the similarity ends. In the books, he is supposed to be a tall, broad Viking, whereas Skarsgaard is a bit slimmer and more brooding. I don't think that's a failure in casting because as mentioned for Compton's character, Skarsgaard plays him quiet and brooding which adds another dimension to Eric Northman not seen in the books.
What I enjoyed about the tv show is that it strayed a lot from the books. I am sure I will get a lot of grief about this but it's a good thing. Although I enjoyed Harris's books, I truly enjoyed the tv show a lot more. It gave the characters more to play around with and plus, you don't want the same things repeated on screen! You want to see depth and character growth. An example that is sighted quite often is Tara's character. Tara in the books is not seen much, she is an acquaintance of Sookie's and owns a clothing store. In the show, she is one of Sookie's best friends and shags everyone! :) While Harris loyalists claim this is dishonoring the books, I think it's a good thing. Sookie in her lonely journey needs a friend. I think that's what's missing in the books. She is facing all these problems alone, whether it is fighting off werewolves or maenads or trying to sort out her feelings about Bill, she is always alone in the books. On screen, it would seem quite lonely and it would make her a more reclusive person. Also, in the books, she is much like a petulant child, constantly loosing her temper and acting very childish, but in the show, she shows a maturity which shows her attractive to Bill, who is much older and wiser. In reading the books, I did not understand why Bill would be around her.
DEXTER
Again, an enjoyable read. I love the tv show, and I surprisingly liked the books too. The creators of Dexter must have felt that way as well, because they closely follow the books in their approach to the show. The first book, "Darkly Devoted Dexter" is in fact the first season of the show. The show did the book justice as the episodic format enhances the story. As the books are written in Dexter's perspective, the show helps to expand the views of points of view of the characters especially Debra which greatly improves the story. By doing this, it allows TV Dexter to remain accessible and sympathetic even while his brutal extracurricular activities are made even more graphic by the medium of television.
In terms of casting, the creators did a marvelous job. Micheal C. Hall deserves every acolade he can recieve for his performance. He is a wonderful actor but he doesn't detach us from Dexter, in fact, he makes him very likable and accessable. All the supporting cast, including Jennifer Carpenter, Julie Benz among many others just add to the story and make the writing truly come to life.
***
TRUE BLOOD
Argueably one of the best shows I have seen in a while (and yes, it does help that the characters are very sexy).. But thanks to my good friend Judy, I got introduced to the books. Charlaine Harris, the author of the Southern Vampire series, where the characters are introduced and the show is based on is very visual in her style of writing, you get a definite sense of what the characters look and sound like. Anna Paquin who plays Sookie is very similar to her character in the books. The other supporting 'human' cast Jason Stackhouse, Granny Stackhouse and Lafayette are very well represented by their human conterparts. Lafayette is also a delight and I am very glad *spoiler* he continues to live in the tv show, he died to early in the books *end spoiler*
The vampires... That's what all the online fans seem to have a gripe with. Personally, I didn't like Bill Compton in the books, he seemed very arrogant, very uptight and generally very possessive. In the tv show, he seems a little of all those characteristics but they don't dominate him like in the books. In terms of the look, Steven Moyer is a very handsome guy and no doubt does 'look' like Bill Compton. Everyone's favorite Norseman is a different matter. Eric Northman is from Scandinavia like the actor playing him, Alexander Skarsgaard. However, that's where the similarity ends. In the books, he is supposed to be a tall, broad Viking, whereas Skarsgaard is a bit slimmer and more brooding. I don't think that's a failure in casting because as mentioned for Compton's character, Skarsgaard plays him quiet and brooding which adds another dimension to Eric Northman not seen in the books.
What I enjoyed about the tv show is that it strayed a lot from the books. I am sure I will get a lot of grief about this but it's a good thing. Although I enjoyed Harris's books, I truly enjoyed the tv show a lot more. It gave the characters more to play around with and plus, you don't want the same things repeated on screen! You want to see depth and character growth. An example that is sighted quite often is Tara's character. Tara in the books is not seen much, she is an acquaintance of Sookie's and owns a clothing store. In the show, she is one of Sookie's best friends and shags everyone! :) While Harris loyalists claim this is dishonoring the books, I think it's a good thing. Sookie in her lonely journey needs a friend. I think that's what's missing in the books. She is facing all these problems alone, whether it is fighting off werewolves or maenads or trying to sort out her feelings about Bill, she is always alone in the books. On screen, it would seem quite lonely and it would make her a more reclusive person. Also, in the books, she is much like a petulant child, constantly loosing her temper and acting very childish, but in the show, she shows a maturity which shows her attractive to Bill, who is much older and wiser. In reading the books, I did not understand why Bill would be around her.
DEXTER
Again, an enjoyable read. I love the tv show, and I surprisingly liked the books too. The creators of Dexter must have felt that way as well, because they closely follow the books in their approach to the show. The first book, "Darkly Devoted Dexter" is in fact the first season of the show. The show did the book justice as the episodic format enhances the story. As the books are written in Dexter's perspective, the show helps to expand the views of points of view of the characters especially Debra which greatly improves the story. By doing this, it allows TV Dexter to remain accessible and sympathetic even while his brutal extracurricular activities are made even more graphic by the medium of television.
In terms of casting, the creators did a marvelous job. Micheal C. Hall deserves every acolade he can recieve for his performance. He is a wonderful actor but he doesn't detach us from Dexter, in fact, he makes him very likable and accessable. All the supporting cast, including Jennifer Carpenter, Julie Benz among many others just add to the story and make the writing truly come to life.
***
Power...
One of the advantages, one would think living in an apartment would bring, is convinence and your electronic equipment would be safe from lightning storms and the like. Wrong!
On Saturday, we had a heavy rainstorm. For those not living in Colombo, or Sri Lanka for that matter, it was not raining cats and dogs - more like the entire petstore. It was crazy, and yours truly was driving around, praying that the car engine wouldn't get wet and eventually stall. Branches were scattered all over the ground, flooding was rampant thanks to the excellent drainage we have in our fair city. Along with the rain, we have our thunder and lightning. When we came home, Hubby immediately ran around, unplugging everything in sight, from computers, to the television. However, one computer wasn't unplugged and all the USBs were, in Hubby's words "completely fried".. And not happy at all. And when Hubby is not happy, run for cover...
I do not claim to be a technical sort of gal, I can install programs, use Microsoft programs, and thanks to Hubby, can make my way around Linux Mint, Ubuntu (a few years ago, I wouldn't have even known the existence of them!) and so on. I don't claim to know how things "fry" unless it's in a pan. Like I said above, I really thought (in retrospect very naive of me, especially being a native SLan) when the resident technician told me things were 'grounded' here, I truly believed him. Plus, things were connected to the UPS. But apparently, these problems can come through the television antennae. Who would have thought?
Anyway, the computer is still fried and yesterday and today, I could hear the continous moping of my dear darling Hubby, the usual stuff from "I pay for everything..." to "I am always fixing things.. I have no time for anything".. So hopefully, this will be a one-time thing, as we have to disconnect everything after he finishes fixing this thing.
Thus, brings me to my lack of posting. Things are quite quiet over here, other than the rumbles of an annoyed Hubby.. Sonny boy is constantly coming up with new sentences and amazing way of analyzing things. But nothing terribly significant.
Will post soon though...
If anyone has any suggestions on what they would like to read about - whether it is a new cooking recipe (I swear I will make something this weekend, its a toss between Lasange or Chocolate Brownies..) or a new movie review.. Let me know.. Also, I just finished reading the Dexter books, so I am planning a review on that coming up soon!
Mothers...
It really bothers me that mothers can truly get under their daughter's skin. Case in point - my mother claims I am a horrible daughter just because I didn't send her kendha leaves (they are used to make a concoction which is helpful to reduce her cholestrol), and that I didn't finish a letter she wanted. Firstly, I admit I did forget about the kendhe but at the same time, she doesn't have a servant at home to make it for her and when she comes home, she can get it from our place. Regarding the letter, the corrections were minimum (adding a comma, changing literally ONE word) - which I completed before picking up my son in school. She made me cry... which is not a pretty sight.. She made it sound like I did something very horrendously bad to her, which I didn't do intentionally..
I wrote an article some time back about Mothers and Daughters, I will repeat it here...
***
Mothers and Daughters – Can They Ever Be Friends?
The relationship between mothers and daughters are usually quite strained. When we are younger, our mothers seem the all-knowing ever-present caring women who we look up to and admire. We daughters smear our faces with their lipsticks, borrow their big shoes and try and emulate our mommies. Then as we reach our teenage years, “mommy” becomes “oh mother” as she suddenly becomes the most ignorant, out-of-touch creature on the planet. As we get continue to get older, we seem to earn their disapproval at every nook and cranny. We never seem good enough, thin enough, exercise enough, I could go on. Hopefully, when we reach our mid-30s and beyond, if we are lucky, according to psychologists, we become best friends with our mothers again. What causes this unusual bond?
No relationship is quite as primal as the one between a mother and her daughter. "It's the original relationship, and it's also a relationship that has been sentimentalized but not honoured," says Lee Sharkey, Ph.D., who directs the Women's Studies program at the University of Maine at Farmington, where she teaches a popular course in mother-daughter relationships. "Women grow up and our energy is largely turned toward men, but the original love relationship is with a mother. If we as daughters don't acknowledge that, we're closing ourselves off from a great source of power and fulfilment and understanding of ourselves."
But mothers and daughters aren't always best friends. Storm clouds in the adult mother-daughter relationship most often arise over one very basic question, says Laura Tracy, Ph.D., a family therapist who specializes in counselling mother-daughter pairs and has written books on the relationships between women. "Will the mother accept the daughter as an adult? That means, when she's visiting you, does she let you run your house? Does she trust you to be independent on small issues as well as large — who are you with, what's your sexuality, where do you work, how do you spend your money? Letting the daughter be her own woman is a universal issue," she explains.
Mothers often find it hard to let go of their children, especially their daughters. They have seen them growing up, changed their diapers, kissed away tears and listened to stories of teenage love and romance. They cannot picture their daughters as fully-functional adults. In their eyes, they are still their little baby who scraped her knee and wailed for her mother.
Mothers and daughters who struggle with their relationships as adults often repeat the old patterns of control and rebellion from childhood, says Dr. Tracy. "They can't hear each other. The daughter will hear the mother say something and she'll think, 'She wants to control me.' And the mother is saying something that absolutely is controlling, but is not meant to be." Meanwhile, when the daughter speaks, the mother hears nothing but anger — in a comment that does indeed convey anger but also "I love you, and can't we do this differently?"
As daughters, we seem to very rarely if not never gain our mother’s approval. No matter how successful, or thin, we are, we are still not good enough. There is always someone better, thinner, who exercises more than us.
However, believe it or not, most mothers are supportive of their daughters, even though they may not show it to them. “[They] want to be supportive of their daughters, and feel very confused by them," says Juanita Johnson, a New York-based therapist and storyteller who does presentations on the mother-daughter relationship with her own 27-year-old daughter. "One of the things that I observe quite frequently is that the mother knows so very little about her own self that she's placing way too much emphasis on how her daughter turns out rather than, 'What do I know about myself and how do I feel about myself?' I think daughters can model a great deal from a mother who is self-aware herself."
The irony is, most women fear of growing up to be like one's mother. It has long been so common among Western women that it has a name — matrophobia. It is quite common and usually after a while, we daughters do realize that mother was right after all (about certain things, of course!!).
The best gift a mother can give a daughter — and, as she becomes an adult, that a daughter can give her mother — is permission to be herself, says Juanita Johnson. "The daughter can be who she wants to be because the mother is who she wants to be, and I think increasingly mothers understand that," she says. "If daughters have trouble navigating being an adolescent, it's often because they don't know who they are. They're sacrificing themselves to fit in. All that spunkiness they had as a little girl goes out the window and they lose touch with what I call their internal compass."
Anna takes pride in her daughters' strength. "I think they're all independent and strong-willed women, which is good, but they're also kind. It's important to be your own woman, but also to have some compassion and understanding of other people, otherwise I think your life is too narrow," she observes. "Women are told now that they must be strong and assertive, and that's fine, but you need another component also to have a satisfying life. That's how I see them, and I hope that's something that I've given them."
***
Honestly, I doubt mothers and daughters EVER being friends.. Its not like they compete with each other, I think they are on different frequencies.. I adore my mum, but honestly, sometimes she can be a pain..
Gossip
If you know me well, you know I love to read about the lives of the rich and famous. Its not that I am a complete loser (please don't answer that) but it's just fascinating to me.. from ordinary people, these celebrities become complete eccentric weird caricatures of themselves i.e. Lindsey Lohan, Britney Spears among others.. Whereas some are just interesting to look at i.e. Brad Pitt, Hugh Jackman, some are just scary..
My rant however, is when did 'reality show' people become the new IT celebrities? It hasn't been that long but Jon and Kate only came on the scene recently, soon after the annoying girls from The Hills, and Laguna Beach... Why, oh why... I don't want to read about the many divorce battles, the terrible fashion lines these people get.. They are famous for being infamous and complete idiots.. and why do they get paid more than me, and any other hard working celeb, I have no idea.. Sometimes, I don't know what's more pathetic, me reading these stupid stories, reading the comments by other idiots reading these stories, or just the writers who have nothing else to write about..
Give me proper celebrity gossip!
Baby talk Part 3
Seriously, kids say the darnest things... Cases in point :-
* When Hubby's uncle was drinking his usual vitamin syrup, the smart one asks "Thithay-de (is it sour)".. Uncle's reply, "Chut-tak (a little)".. What does my son respond, "Thithe keeyanna epa, gunai (don't say its sour, its good for you)"
* He suddenly tells me last night, "I want to take a shower, I want to brush my teeth, I want to wear pijamas and I want to sleep" - that's the longest sentence EVER coming from him
* "I like you Mummy..."
* When Hubby's uncle was drinking his usual vitamin syrup, the smart one asks "Thithay-de (is it sour)".. Uncle's reply, "Chut-tak (a little)".. What does my son respond, "Thithe keeyanna epa, gunai (don't say its sour, its good for you)"
* He suddenly tells me last night, "I want to take a shower, I want to brush my teeth, I want to wear pijamas and I want to sleep" - that's the longest sentence EVER coming from him
* "I like you Mummy..."